De-Bunking the Top 10 Myths about Planning for an Unexpected Death (Because Guess Who’ll Be Picking Up the Pieces?)

Planning for an unexpected death isn’t top of mind for most families — it feels distant and unlikely. But life doesn’t always follow the plan, and being unprepared will leave the surviving spouse and children vulnerable. As someone who’s helped families navigate the fallout of losing a spouse or parent, I know that taking simple steps now can make all the difference later.

Unfortunately, myths about end-of-life planning often prevent families from starting. Let’s unpack and debunk these misconceptions, so you can protect your family and provide them with the security they deserve, no matter what life throws your way.  

1. It’s only for the elderly – Younger families are often the most vulnerable when a spouse dies. They typically have less savings, more debt, and greater demands on their time and finances. The loss of income, health insurance, and other benefits can drastically change a family’s standard of living, leaving them reliant on government programs, community support, or loved ones for basic needs.

2. We’re too young – Death doesn’t discriminate by age.  According to 2021 data, 4.3 percent of children under the age of 18 have lost at least one parent.  That doesn’t sound like many until you consider that’s one in every 25 kids.  Think about that!  That’s one child in every classroom at school.   Planning is about protecting your family, regardless of how young you are.

3. It’s too late – Whether you’re in an advanced age, an empty nester, or have serious health challenges, it’s never too late to plan. Though some circumstances may limit certain options (e.g. affordable life insurance for someone with a terminal illness), even small steps, like completing a Family Care Manual to document important information, can make a big difference for your loved ones. 

4. Spouse wants me dead if I have life insurance – This fear is more common than you might think, as illustrated in this humorous ad by Ladder. But let’s be clear: life insurance is about protecting your family, not sowing distrust. One widow in our support group shared, “We did not have life insurance because my father-in-law didn’t believe in it.  He thought wives kill for that. So we did not have him insured.” 
   
   SAY WHAT? No! This belief is not only unfounded but harmful. Life insurance provides financial security during a devastating time—it’s a gesture of love and security, not suspicion and malintent.

5. It’s too complicated – Starting early makes it simpler. As your wealth increases and your family dynamics evolve, you’ll only need to make adjustments. Plus, there are plenty of tools and professionals to guide you. If you’d like some help, contact us any time. 

6. It’s too expensive – Early planning is more affordable. For instance, term life insurance is cost-effective for young, healthy adults. Online tools and payable-on-death beneficiaries for bank accounts and retirement savings can also minimize costs. 

7. I have life insurance through my work – Employer-provided life insurance is often limited and may not fully meet your family’s needs. Additionally, you could lose coverage if you change jobs.  Think about how terribly ironic it would be to have to quit your job to focus on treatment for a terminal diagnosis, only to leave your family without life insurance because you had to quit your job. 

8. Estate planning is just for the wealthy – If you own anything—a car, bank account, or even sentimental items—you need a plan. Estate planning also ensures care for your children if something happens to both parents. 

9. Planning for an unexpected death makes it happen – Planning doesn’t hasten your demise, just like travel insurance doesn’t cause flight cancellations. In fact, preparation can bring peace of mind, allowing you to focus on living fully.

10. “What do I care?  I’ll be dead.” – This selfish attitude leaves your loved ones to deal with chaos. Families often fight over unassigned assets, and surviving spouses may struggle financially. A widow from our support group shared, “I was so mad at him for a very long time. Went through deep depression. I still worked but just couldn't do it. My credit is still horrible.” Is that how you want to be remembered?  Proper planning is a selfless act of love that ensures your family’s well-being. 

Planning for an unexpected death isn’t about pessimism — it’s about preparation. For families with young children or stay-at-home parents, losing a spouse or parent can bring emotional and financial upheaval. Thoughtful planning ensures that your loved ones have the support they need, even when life takes an unexpected turn. By addressing these common myths and taking small but meaningful steps, you’re showing your family the ultimate act of love. Don’t leave your future to chance — start today.

All the best!

Corey

P.S. Want more strategies to help with end-of-life planning? Sign up to receive email notifications when new tips are posted: https://www.affairsinorder.com/stay-informed

Or download our free resources to get started now: https://www.affairsinorder.com/free-downloads