Grief Support Groups
If you know anything about our journey following the death of Dave and Kris and our struggle to move forward in life afterwards, you know that our widow and widower grief support group played an important role.
Our support team is a private Facebook group specifically for widows and widowers of our faith. It was established over 12 years ago, not by the church, but by a few widowed members of the church in an effort to offer mutual support after the loss of a spouse. When I joined the group six years ago, there were approximately 1500 members. There are now over 7000 from all over the country and even internationally.
I didn’t know that this group existed until I found it in a moment of loneliness. It had been a month after Kris’s passing and I ached so badly. Despite having a couple kids living at home and support from other friends and family, I felt alone. I needed to interact with someone who understood and who could assure me that the pain would go away, or at least decrease. Finding the group was a tender mercy. I would spend hours reading the comments and experiences of the more seasoned widows and widowers reassuring the newbies that we would be okay.
Part of the allure is knowing that everyone in the group is a widow or widower because widowhood verification is required to join. People feel comfortable sharing struggles, challenges, and hardships that they may not be willing to share with others. So many posts to the group start with, “I can’t post this on my regular Facebook page…”
In many ways, this group becomes a new family. When someone vents or posts a question, it’s not uncommon to have more than 100 responses from the other members of the group, and all are uplifting and encouraging.
More than 30 sub-groups have been created from this main group to specifically support different needs. Some of the groups are for people who live in certain geographic regions so they can plan get-togethers. Others include groups for those with kids at home, those in certain age groups, and those who have remarried. Each one offers an outlet of support for specific circumstances.
Finding a Support Group
There are an endless number of other support groups on Facebook that support all kinds of grief. A quick search brings up support groups for those who’ve lost a parent or a child, those whose partners committed suicide, the loss of pets, and young adults in mourning. Many other social media platforms also have their own version of grief support as well.
A simple search on your favorite search engine can also be helpful. You can add search terms that fit whatever criteria you want to help you narrow down the options. Other sources include local churches, senior centers, recreation facilities, and even local government.
Finally, reach out to friends, family, or colleagues who have experienced loss in the last couple years. They probably can refer you to different resources that were helpful for them. They may offer their own advice and become close confidants.